The 'Miley Cyrus' Dilemma

I didn't watch the MTV Video Music Awards.  I'm not a big fan of MTV.  I don't like the idea that music has become an issue of appearance rather than sound.  We have people shoved in front of us with no talent, other than their voices, who have been tailored to look a specific way that someone at the top wants us think is attractive.  Despite the fact that MTV now plays very little in the way of music videos, they had a huge hand in the sexual revolution of 90's that took us to a whole new level of bodily objectification.

Pop Music now is performed by people who look the part, but can't write a single word or note of their own music.  Songwriters, many of whom do not fit the mold for sales, get shoved back into rooms and work tirelessly with the hope that one day their song will be picked up by some attractive singer's manager.  Rap was one of the last bastions of musical originality until people began doing the same.  Now, they (record producers) find a guy who can speak in appropriate rhythm, dress him up in gold and give him a gold 'grill', and then sic him on the masses.  It's become such a production that many of the artists who originally put their word out through the genre of music find it revolting.

I have noticed something happening in our culture, through pop stars, actors and actresses, and through the art in which they take part.  Now that singers have to be a certain image, more and more songwriters are being shoved into those rooms and forced to make music for people who have sex appeal.  This is done to create sales - because music sells much better when some sexy guy or girl sings it rather than the person who wrote it.  I recently saw a meme about people who actually made their own music.  I thought they were funny, but now I see why they're so poignant.


The most recent issue I've had with the image of pop singers comes with the Miley Cyrus fiasco on the MTV VMA's.  Like I said, I didn't watch them, but I sure as hell heard about them.  I figured I'd check it out, to see what all the hub-bub was about.   Well, there was a lot there to talk about.  Unfortunately, it was not the good kind of thing about which to speak.

So, the performance starts with Miley Cyrus coming out of an over-sized teddy bear with her tongue stretched out and around her mouth.  She continued the motif through most of the first verse and chorus of her song.  I was wondering if she thought sticking her tongue out like that made her seem attractive.  I wondered if she even knew what she was singing, or cared about the lyrics.  In my own opinion, it made me wonder what she was thinking.  I read a few articles that were enraged about her performance.  The only one that seemed relevant - as most were accusing her of being slutty for the whole twerking incident - was the one that said she ripped off the image from Rihanna, another female pop star who made her claim to fame by singing sexually explicit and suggestive songs - like Rude Boy.

This made me wonder a few more things.  I wasn't enraged nor attracted to what Miley Cyrus did.  I'm not enraged nor attracted to what Rihanna does.  In fact, while not being offended, I pitied the women who chose those images over themselves.  It was clear that Miley Cyrus was not being herself - but rather being what she thought she should be.  From the reports, she wanted to show an image of maturity and sexual desire - meaning she wanted to put herself out there as a sex object to show the world 'Hey, Miley Cyrus isn't a kid anymore.'  Others have done so in the past as well.  Janet Jackson did so with her album Janet - going from child star to sex symbol with one album.  Since then, female pop-stars that begin as girls and travel to the realm of adulthood in the spotlight have been trying to reproduce it.  However, because they do not write their own songs, do not produce their own music, and try to force the image of adulthood through sexual explicitness, their attempts fail to hit the same message Janet achieved.  Instead, they turn into the 'slutty' image and show young girls, who may look up to them, that in order to become adult, they have wear skimpy clothes, show off their bodies, and start having sex.

Now, I'm all for sexual independence.  I feel that girls and women know when they are ready for it.  But having sex does not make an adult out of a girl, and does not reinforce adulthood in a woman.  Sex is an expression of pleasure, lust, and love.  It can be done in one or all three of the aspects.  Some do it for the simple pleasure of experiencing the single most uniquely human act.  Some do it to attain the woman or man they have pined over for so long.  Some do it to express their love for their companion.  Some do it for all three.  While it is an adult act, it does not make a girl more of a woman outside of the physical reality that the girl's body is getting ready for adult activities.

The bigger question here, for me, is what does it say about our society?  Does it say that the true measure of a woman is in her sexual prowess?  Does it say that to become an adult she must become sexually active or sexually desirable?  I understand that many women have the dilemma of growing out of their childhood.  Many feel that by dressing as adults, they can be taken as adults.  By partaking in adult activities, they can be seen as adult.  But that is only an image, not a truth.  In my opinion, the truest proof of womanhood is not with how many men she's been with, or in how well she performs sexual acts, but in how well she maintains her own self image despite her surroundings, and how strong she proves herself against the adversity life brings.  The truth of a woman is much more than what she appears, how she looks, or whether or not she's good in bed.  The same can be said for men - but the social aspect is much more present in the female gender.

A girl can remain a girl throughout her life, if she does not accept the trials and difficulties life brings.  A girl, in my mind, does not become a woman until she understands the realities of life.  In the spotlight of stardom, such a thing is hard to accomplish.  People will give in and enable so much that a girl growing up as a celebrity has it even more difficult than a girl growing up in hometown USA.  Instead of being exposed to realities of life, the girl is pampered and given anything she wants - so much so that the girl celebrity thinks the only way she can throw off her childish coil is by making herself a sex object, or turning to drugs - as most adults do for escape.  Instead of staying true to herself, she makes a huge display of herself in front of the world.  See Britney Spears, Jessica Simpson, Rihanna, Madonna, and now, Miley Cyrus.

Back to the twerking incident - I feel sorry for Miley Cyrus because she felt she had to do something like that to get her image to change from good girl (as presented in Robin Thicke's portion of the medley) to 'bad girl' so she could be seen as developing into an adult.  She wore skimpy clothes, displayed herself in a very sexually explicit manner (using the foam finger as a humping toy), and twerked all over Robin Thicke - a clearly adult oriented male pop star.  Nevermind the idea that Robin Thicke's song was about turning good girl's into bad girls - another message I tend to loathe (the idea that a man could go in and use a good girl for sex and then dump her like a bad habit once he was through - thus turning her into a 'bad girl' who becomes 'slutty').  This image does not promote her adulthood to me - what it appeared to me as was a confused girl who was trying to be something she wasn't.

Afterwards, the memes came in droves.  They ranged from making fun of Miley Cyrus twerking - like this one - to making fun of Miley Cyrus' body - like this one.  This also disappointed me.  Yes, it looked like Miley Cyrus should have worn something different if she was trying to make herself a sex object.  However, this also shows how our society is unforgiving of a woman's body.  Women's bodies vary from one to the other.  Women go through child-birth and many other changes through their lives to where their bodies do not hold up - the same can be said for men, sans child-birth, of course.  Granted, Miley Cyrus has not had a child - from what I know - but the fact that we have people making fun of her for her body reinforces the idea that women should be seen as such.  At least celebrity women.

If you look at society since the dawning of pictures, magazines and film, women have been under more pressure by men to maintain a certain body type to be desirable.  While women are reversing the trend by placing the same standards on men, it says a lot about our culture that we place more importance on what a person looks like than who a person is.  Our measure of successful aging is remaining fit and youthful in appearance, not in learning life lessons or staying healthy despite all the temptations otherwise - but by maintaining a sexy image.  This has caused a lot of girls to become anorexic, bulimic, bipolar, or simply unhealthy because they are concerned about gaining weight and aren't willing to eat what they need to eat to remain healthy.  This practice leads to obesity and poor self-image, as well as mental instability - One's mind is not focused when one is hungry and malnourished.  Yet, instead of addressing this issue, we, as a society, encourage women to resort to these measures simply by accepting what is presented by a small group of men and women who edit and control what is put on a magazine, film or video.  Just because one man likes it doesn't mean all men do.  But that's the implied value when it's put in our face and we are told it's attractive.

Healthy is different in all men and women.  Attractive is different for each man and woman.  There is no one image for it.  Beauty comes in many different forms - and most are too abstract to be noticed through image.


Likewise, adulthood is not given in concrete image, either.  It's assumed when one decides to say no despite the desire to say yes; it's making the hard decision to be responsible rather than making the easy choice of giving in to social pressure; it's choosing, and understanding what the choice will bring; it's accepting the consequences of actions taken and living with them as best as one can; it's becoming independent in thought, and not driven by what other people want; It's becoming truly oneself without repressing ideals for someone else.

I will say this again in closing - Miley Cyrus twerking on stage did not outrage me, did not titillate me, did not amuse me.  It made me feel sorry for our society, and hope that in the future, we can do better than assume adulthood and beauty can both be attained by becoming an image someone else wants.